Consistent Effort Brings Results

Do you ever find yourself saying that when your circumstances change that YOU are going to change? I am in the THROES of mothering 3 young boys (7, 4, and 1). I am awake in the night more times than my watch can keep track of. The baby is in the phase of I-want-to-dump-everything-on-the-floor-as-quickly-as-possible so my house is nowhere NEAR the cleanliness level I want. With all the demands of this stage of life, I sometimes find myself thinking, "When my kids are a little older, THEN I'll be able to do/be _________." While it might be a little bit true that I'll have more energy if/when I get more sleep, some of the things that I think I'll be able to do once my kids are older are things I struggled to be consistent with BEFORE I had kids. I often use my kids as an excuse for why I don't do something rather than getting creative with the time/energy I do have to accomplish what I want.

The fact of the matter is that you don't magically improve when your circumstances change. It takes conscience effort to become who you want to be and achieve what you want to accomplish. Rather than telling myself that I will do these things someday, I need to look at how I can do what I want/need to do TODAY. There is time to become who I want to become. I can take small actions daily, which will eventually yield big results over time! What is something you can do today to get you closer to the person you want to become? Let's cheer each other on!

2 years

2 years ago I found out that I was pregnant with my third child. Even though I had felt the pull to have one final child, I was very hesitant to actually have it come to fruition. Not only was I in the best shape of my life, I was not looking forward to the pregnancy woes and the actual difficulty that having another child brings. For over half my pregnancy and even after my baby was born, I focused so much on the negative changes rather than the blessings. But, I know that the experience of having my baby come into our family was meant to be. I have learned lessons I could have learned no other way. Most importantly, I have been knocked down and humbled more than I ever thought possible. I have had days that I wasn't sure I would be able to make it to the end. But, I did. I am here. I am still standing. And that counts for something. 

You Are Not Alone

After I had my second baby, I was really struggling. The stresses of life and the exhaustion of a newborn and preschooler were overwhelming. Adding to that, I was the most overweight I've been in my life. I started having body image issues. I didn't recognize my body or even my mind. I felt so alone.

I saw all these beautiful mom and baby pictures on social media. People would say that they were so in love with their babies right from the start. They seemed so happy. They seemed to have clean houses, fit bodies, happy children, and organized lives. I felt like I was the only one barely keeping it together.

And then a friend posted about her own struggle post partum. She was open and honest. Her willingness to be open and vulnerable changed everything for me. I finally felt seen and heard. I no longer felt crazy. I knew I wasn't alone. My spirits were lifted.

I vowed then to openly share about my own life in the hopes that through my voice, others can feel seen, heard, and uplifted. Whether you are seeing the success you want or if you feel like you're barely surviving, know that you are not alone. We are all connected. Who is someone you can reach out to and lift up today? 

You Were Made to Set Sail

You were made to sail, not sit comfortably in the harbor. You were made to have experiences and weather storms. Lifting a heavy anchor can feel daunting. Leaving the safety of the harbor to go into the unknown is scary. It's easier to remain anchored to where you are rather than moving on to a new destination.

Yet, you were built for this. You were made to learn and grow through your journey. Choosing to follow your heart will uplift and inspire others to do the same in their own lives. You have unique thoughts, ideas, and talents that are meant to be known and shared so that they might buoy others on their journeys. What is something you've wanted to do, but have felt nervous to start? Let's cheer each other on!

Roller Coaster

This month has been full of so many emotional and mental ups and downs. I've had some really big LOWS and some moments where I look around in complete awe and joy of what I've been given in my life. My thoughts and feelings have run the gamut and, frankly, it's been really rough. Mostly, I've felt extremely tired, down, and a huge lack of motivation. I've doubted my business. I've doubted that I should do anything outside of simply being the best mom I can. I have doubted my abilities. I have doubted that I am wanted and loved by others. I have felt very alone. I have looked around waiting for someone to save me, to pick me up, to pull it together. But, no one is coming. I have to save myself. 

I have tried to pay attention to why I have so low this month, honestly more low than I've maybe ever felt in my life. I want to determine why so that I can fix it and improve. I even just had my thyroid hormones checked to see if that's what is causing this. Nope, they're fine. 

I think a part of it is simply that it's the winter and winter is hard for me. I think it gets more difficult every year, especially feeling trapped inside with sick kids. 

I got time to nap plus a small break to work for 45 minutes BY MYSELF and it felt wonderful. I felt so excited and motivated I felt like I helped people, which I love doing. I felt like people were excited about a book I shared, which was so nice. I remembered that I love to be creative in this way with my business. I love the puzzle and challenge it is and the way it pushes me to try new things, something that isn't the norm in my current mom phase. 

So maybe I just need more sleep (please let me sleep tonight, kids!) and maybe I just need more alone time to work in order to feel excited and motivated about my life again? I love my kids, but I really do need some time to myself sometimes too. I feel guilty being away (which rarely happens), but I know that I am a better person when I get some time to myself. 

Unrelated, but this is weighing on me... the past few weeks since Harrison came down with a bad cold and cough has been so hard. He's yelled so much and just been so tired and ornery. I just don't know how to help him to stop yelling and stop being so defiant. 

He and Lincoln are another issue. They fight so much from the second they wake up... no joke. Right when they see other, they usually start making faces or arguing about something. I see the comparison and jealousy happening. I see how Harrison specifically is happy when Lincoln gets in trouble because it's not him getting in trouble. The sibling rivalry is SO strong with these two and I need to figure out how to turn this around. I need to figure out how to encourage them to love and uplift each other. I really do try, but I feel like I am not getting through to them. Time to read a book or two and see if I can find SOME method to encourage them that will help. Wish me luck! 

The Sun Shone

It's amazing how much the sun shining can affect my mood. I went on a walk with the little boys, cleaned out the coat closet, participated in a business call. It felt nice to get some things done and not feel so down and lost. 

You Always Have a Choice

One of my favorite books is Man's Search for Meaning. I love it because it reminds me that no matter your circumstances and struggles, you always have a choice. 

This past week - really the past 6 to 8 weeks - has been really tough mentally. I've struggled and felt more down and depressed than I think I've ever felt. Some days it's been all I can do to keep my chin up and make it to the end of the day in one piece. Over this past weekend, I'll be honest that there were times where mentally I was struggling more than I thought I could bear. 

But, guess what? I didn't die from mental exertion. I'm still here to tell the tale, although I may need therapy. ;) Even when it sometimes feels too hard to stay positive in those rough moments, in the end, my thoughts are what dictate my beliefs and shape my experiences. I have a choice if I am going to choose to see the good or if I am going to focus on the difficulties. 

Even though it can be so hard to see the good in a struggle, it is worth it. Life is too short to love otherwise.